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Thursday 8 December 2011

Investment Banker's Letter After Second Date Rejection



Have you read this letter from an investment banker to his first date - after she didn't go out with him for a second date?

It's a beauty.

And it's doing the rounds in inboxes around the world.

Have a read:

(PS: this is a file photo - not Mike, the man in question!)


Hi Lauren,

I’m disappointed in you. I’m disappointed that I haven’t gotten a response to my voicemail and text messages.


FYI, I suggest that you keep in mind that emails sound more impersonal, harsher, and are easier to misinterpret than in-person or phone communication. After all, people can't see someone's body language or tone of voice in an email. I'm not trying to be harsh, patronizing, or insulting in this email. I'm honest and direct by nature, and I'm going to be that way in this email. By the way, I did a google search, so that’s how I came across your email.


I assume that you no longer want to go out with me. (If you do want to go out with me, then you should let me know.) I suggest that you make a sincere apology to me for giving me mixed signals. I feel led on by you.


Things that happened during our date include, but are not limited to, the following:


-You played with your hair a lot. A woman playing with her hair is a common sign of flirtation. You can even do a google search on it. When a woman plays with her hair, she is preening. I've never had a date where a woman played with her hair as much as you did. In addition, it didn't look like you were playing with your hair out of nervousness.


-We had lots of eye contact during our date. On a per-minute basis, I've never had as much eye contact during a date as I did with you.


-You said, "It was nice to meet you." at the end of our date. A woman could say this statement as a way to show that she isn't interested in seeing a man again or she could mean what she said--that it was nice to meet you. The statement, by itself, is inconclusive.


-We had a nice conversation over dinner. I don't think I'm being delusional in saying this statement.


In my opinion, leading someone on (i.e., giving mixed signals) is impolite and immature. It’s bad to do that.


Normally, I would not be asking for information if a woman and I don't go out again after a first date. However, in our case, I'm curious because I think our date went well and that there is a lot of potential for a serious relationship. Of course, it's difficult to predict what would happen, but I think there is a lot of potential for a serious relationship developing between us one day (or least there was before your non-response to my voicemail and text messages).


I think we should go out on a second date. In my opinion, our first date was good enough to lead to a second date.


Why am I writing you? Well, hopefully, we will go out again. Even if we don't, I gain utility from expressing my thoughts to you. In addition, even if you don't want to go out again, I would like to get feedback as to why you wouldn't want to go again. Normally, I wouldn't ask a woman for this type of feedback after a first date, but this is an exception given I think we have a lot of potential.


If you don't want to go again, then apparently you didn't think our first date was good enough to lead to a second date. Dating or a relationship is not a Hollywood movie. It’s good to keep that in mind. In general, I thought the date went well and was expecting that we would go out on a second date.


To read the rest, go here:

What lengths have you gone to when rejected by a guy/girl?

Would you write an essay like this one?

Spill.

1 comment:

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