Halloween: scary or just good fun? How my reluctance morphed into enthusiasm

Halloween.

Does the word send a shiver up your spine, or excite you ("woo, another reason to dress up!")?

Last week - for me - it was the former.

My daughter said something about Halloween when I picked her up from daycare during our usual daycare-round-up conversation, and immediately my head went to: "Oh no, they've told them about Halloween!" I can't 'hide' this 'festival' from them any longer!"

My head also went to: me reluctantly buying outfits and scary skulls, and sugary lollies and other things in the category I call waste-of-money. I'm no Grinch but it was something I didn't really want my kids to take part in. I am not sure why, but I am sure that reluctance to be 'Americanised' (too late for that) floated around in my head. (And really, most of the time, I do enjoy 'Americanisation').

I hadn't given it much thought since last week. My daughter wanted me to buy a witch hat and a bag of skull-logo lollies on a random trip to Big W on Saturday, and I did. I had no interest in trick or treating and certainly wasn't going to introduce the idea... well at least not until she begged me to when she found out all her friends were doing it...

But today... today, yes... it was a different story.

I was happy to dress up my daughter in a Halloween outfit someone gifted her last year, as all the kids were invited to put on their Halloween best at daycare (I will admit I called the daycare this AM to check: "Are they dressing up in Halloween gear today?"). My daughter loves any excuse for a dress-up (so do I!) and it was a thrill to see her so excited about her outfit and how to coordinate it (again, it in her DNA).

I was not prepared at all for my son, and so popped over to Big W where all the Halloween motif tees were sold out, so I had to make do with a rather funky pair of khaki shorts with tiny skulls all over. A flouro tee with something scary I now can't remember on the front also made the cut. He hates things on his head but he bravely put on those ridiculously fun headband things with horns or some-such scary madness. I am sure he took them off two minutes later, cute little poppet.

The Reject Shop also got a visit... again, they were mostly sold out of spooky merchandise but I did find a silver tinsel skull garland, a fabulous little 'Beware' sign which plays that spooky organ music (Bach's 'Toccata'), and witches hats with flowy black hair. Perfect. Fun enough to be a part of Halloween - not scary enough to freak them the hell out.

And so: will I embrace the Halloween tradition with each passing year? Highly likely. I am already starting to feel twinges of being "peer-pressured mum" - that is, wanting to conform to what everyone else's kids are doing so my kids don't feel left out (trust me, you'll do the same for your kiddies).

But I actually find that I DO enjoy the notion of camaraderie and fun and dress-ups for the kids... and what's so scary about that?

F*ck Valentine's Day! Or, ahhh Valentine's Day...

Aaargh! Valentine's Day!!

Or... ohhhh, Valentine's Day!

Depending on which side of that dreaded love fence you sit, it's either the stuff of nightmares or the day you've been waiting for all year (especially if this time last year you were single).

But don't be fooled that this day is any less 'stressful' for the loved up.

Depending on your 'relationship status' (thanks Facebook, for forcing us all to define it), it also raises many other modern-day quandaries: is your f-buddy meant to crossover to boyfriend-status on this dripping-with-expectation day?

And is your de facto/live-in BF meant to propose today?

And if so, where? In your teeny apartment amongst takeaway boxes? Or on a white-sand beach somewhere exotic? On the Sydney Harbour BridgeClimb along with 4,000 other couples who've already done it? Or in a crowded restaurant surrounded by other usually-not-that-romantic-lovers?

See, there is pressure everywhere, people!

In my humble opinion, if you've been with your man for years and expect grand gestures, you'll be disappointed. My boyfriend would make a huge effort - think teddybears, flowers, cards, the whole catastrophe - and yes, after years of haphazard dating and relationships, I thoroughly lapped it up. This continued well into our early married years. Workmates can attest that I'd receive singing balloons at work, delivered to reception, with my work pals egging me on to carry them from the reception desk to mine, then carry them home on the train (I'd always decline on the latter challenge... I mean, seriously!?)

Last year, with two year old twins and no babysitter and the opportunity for hubby to work that day, I found myself at a dear friend's nephew's birthday party with the kids. We had a quiet meal later and a glass of wine together - and I loved it.

This year, not much romance is planned. With no babysitters on tap and work to attend to during the day, it's expected to be another night at home with those I love. I've suggested the four of us go to a food court later (I wouldn't dare think of disturbing other couples at exy restaurants with the shenanigans - and tantrums - of three year old twins) and share a meal together, where we can make mess, noise and still feel like we've "done something."

Not that it honestly matters. All year 'round we do romantic stuff for each other. But it's not what you think...

On Saturday, hubby did the kids' baths so I could slip out for a pal's birthday drinks. Now that's romance to me. And I make his fave meals every day of the week. Nothing says love more than that.

This article from my fave news site The Punch is the best piece I've read on the oft-dreaded day.

It's hard to pull out the best paragraph from it, but I will start with this one:

"Usually when you go out for a meal, there’s a slim chance that you’ll be challenged to keep your dinner down because of the rouge couple in the corner who spend more time eating each other’s tongues than their mains. However, when 7pm on Feb 14 hits, if you’re not copulating on the table, you’re the odd one out. It’s nauseating. I’d rather be lying on the couch watching rubbish I’d never admit to IQ-ing, than trying to swallow my Steak Diane in a sea of 15 couples waist deep in foreplay."

And this one:

"If you’re single and you don’t have a date on Valentine’s Day, that doesn’t make you any less of a person, and if you’re in a relationship where you have to wait till the middle of February every year to get your partner to put in a little effort, it’s probably time you packed your little handkerchief on a stick and set off for greener pastures."

To read the whole article, go here:

http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/this-valentines-day-spare-a-thought-for-the-cynical/?referrer=email&source=Punch_nl&emcmp=Punch&emchn=Newsletter&emlist=Member

Valentine's Day: it's either: "F*ck Valentine's Day!" or "F*ck, Valentine's Day." Wherever you sit, there is hope! It's called February 15...