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Tuesday, 15 November 2011

Ben Fordham and his wedding ring: the debate for and against wearing one


Did you see this morning's segment of 'Girls On The Grill' on the 'Today' show about why some men don't wear a wedding ring?

Earlier in the show, Karl Stefanovic had intro-ed the topic by cheekily asking newly-married Ben Fordham, "Why don't you wear a wedding ring?"

Clearly it was a lead-in to the debate which was to ensue, but I was a little aghast at Ben's initial comments.

"You know what, when you wear a wedding ring, you get targeted by other women I've been told."

"Yeah that's true Fordo," chimed in Karl.

"And Jodie [Ben's wife] bought that?", adds Lisa cheekily.

Continues Ben: "[Camerman Timmy Hawkins told me that]... when you get the ring on your finger there are some women out there who are deviants, and they're married as well, and they go, 'Oh, hang on a moment, there's an easy target - he won't talk'."

After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I recall that I'd wondered about Fordo's wedding ring a few weeks ago, too.

Watching the Today Show in New York on a Monday, the weekend papers had shown a photo of Ben Fordham on his wedding day to (Channel 7) reporter Jodie Speers, and there was Ben, sans wedding ring.
Gorgeous couple Ben Fordham and his wife Jodie Speers on their wedding day
I remember thinking, 'Really? But you just got married!' At least wait a few months before you declare you don't want to wear your wedding ring anymore/you've put on weight and your fingers are fatter/you can't wear it everyday while working as you're scared you'll scratch it/dirty it/lose it.

Later, when Ben was grilled about it all, he had more to share on the topic.

Said Ben: "When you enter into a relationship, you enter with honesty; so be honest with your partner and say, 'Hey, in all honesty I don't feel comfortable wearing jewellery, I never have in my life - can you work with that?'"

Asks Georgie Gardner - making reference to Ben's earlier comment on women targeting married men - : "Can we talk about this theory of yours that when you wear a wedding ring you're a target for women."

Ben replies with reference to his mate again, who claims that "married women target blokes who have a ring on."

Interjects Lisa: "If women come up to you, and they test you, you've got to be able to pass that test."

Both blokes wave off any suggestions of 'testing' being of any relevance.

Adds Karl: "At some point or another, somewhere into your marriage, you women become like predators, seeking other blokes. You can't get enough of it from other blokes. But why don't you just start 'predator-ing' your husband? Pursue your husband, not us."

Says Lisa: "You know what it says? It says to the world, 'I am married to the love of my life.'"

In closing, Karl looks deadpan at the cameras and declares: "Jewellery is materialistic. Marriage is of the heart."

I have written on this topic before, namely, about Prince William's intention to not wear his wedding ring: http://josiesjuice.blogspot.com/2011/04/prince-william-wont-wear-his-wedding.html

Many of my social media pals replied, with varying points of view, all completely valid.

For me? I find nothing sexier, more committed, more lovely than seeing my husband wear his wedding ring every day. He never, ever takes it off. I adore that.

Does that make him more loving and committed than other married men I know who are unequivocally devoted to their wives, and may not necessarily wear their wedding ring? Absolutely not.

Does it make me feel happy and loved? Yep, sure does. I wear mine every time I leave the house and feel kinda naked if I happen to forget it, which rarely happens.

I swear, years ago, a year into our marriage, I'd forgotten to wear it and I saw an ex-boyfriend on my way to work. I felt discombobulated and wished I'd had it on so I could show him the finger. The middle one.

That's the thing about a wedding band or an engagement ring - it says your 'taken'. Now, I am not suggesting that without one you are more likely to have random sex with strangers, or feel any less 'spoken for.' For me, it just feels comfy and right. And I don't think a piece of jewellery will make my husband or I less likely to stray if we really wanted to. As I said, for me, it just fits.

Thoughts? Share!

8 comments:

  1. Sorry ben i dont agree with you!!

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  5. Ben, put on your wedding ring! It says you are 'spoken for'. Sheesh, you JUST got married... C'mon...!

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  6. A debate on the wearing and not wearing of a wedding ring. A nice and informative post for its readers.

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