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Wednesday 25 April 2012

Your Vagina: Too Dark?

A few days ago, a friend (thanks, Rina!) posted a link from the site Jezebel and I HAD to read it:

"Your Vagina Isn’t Just Too Big, Too Floppy, and Too Hairy - It’s Also Too Brown".

I almost choked on my morning coffee.

And then, I couldn't wait to read the whole thing.

The fabulously funny intro:

"Good news, ladies! Society has discovered another new thing that's wrong with you, which means another opportunity for you to make yourself more attractive for your man. Score! Turns out, the color of your vagina is gross and everyone hates it. So bleach that motherfucker. Bleach it right now!"

The Indian TV ad that inspired the Jezebel piece is a corker (and obviously, unintentionally funny).


And the YouTube note accompanying the Clean and Dry Intimate Wash ad, equally amusing:

"Designed to address the problems women face in their private parts, Clean and Dry Intimate Wash offers protection, fairness and freshness. To be used while showering, its special pH-balanced formula cleans and protects the affected area, and even makes the skin fairer. Life for women will now be fresher, cleaner, fairer!"

I hesitated for days to blog about this; would it be deemed to crass, too out there, too... vagina-ry for my readers?

Well, I couldn't contain the Catholic girl inside me anymore... it's just too good, too controversial a topic to not write about.

The gist of the article is that, hello... we now have something else to be concerned about, another thing to add to our list of beauty upkeep: the colour of our vaginas.

The absurd notion in the ad is that, 1) you can actually change the colour of your vagina. And 2) you will be far more desirable if your vagina is... er, lighter.

What do you think of this [absurd] hilarity?


  1. I had to re-read this, although I'm far from prudish I couldn't believe what I was actually reading...AND the clip is absolutely PRICELESS!

    As if women don't already have enough issues regarding self esteem & the whole 'pressure to be perfect' hoopla?!

    The one thing that really sticks in my mind after reading this is 'how do they establish what a normal vagina should look like?'. I always thought it was a matter of 'horses for courses', not any different to a woman's preference of what she thinks a great penis looks like, whether they prefer circumcised, non-circumcised & why etc etc.

    Ahhh...I'm going to be giggling to myself about this story for weeks Josie!

  2. Besides being pretty shocking, have to say. quite hilarious: "WHAT IF MY CAR BREAKS DOWN AT NIGHT AND I DON'T HAVE A REFLECTIVE ENOUGH VAGINA?" Ha ha ha

  3. Lindy West should write novels. I love a good laugh. The article is brilliant, I have never laughed so hard. Thanks Josie. - Donna

  4. Too funny, I nearly peed myself laughing!

    I was actually going to comment that I was thinking to stand over a mirror to check but was worried that I would pee from laughing while doing so!

    Don't forget when you get your hand mirror to equip yourself with sunglasses too, to protect your eyes from possible glare.

    I should add to that - that while we all knew you could go blind playing with yourself, apparently you can now go blind from simply looking at yourself! - Michelle

  5. It's how you use it that matters, not what it looks like. - Sharon

  6. What next?! The clip is a pisser.

  7. That's why your blog is so good... one day you write about accessories, the next, vaginas. Keep up with the 'colourful' posts, please!